I learnt many years ago that the most powerful person in a committee is not the necessarily the person in the Chair, but the one who sets the agenda - the selection of topics for discussion sets the boundaries within which you work.
So when Christians gather in church, they may say a creed, summarising their Christian beliefs, and in the sermon the word is preached - and all assent to their shared faith.
But what happens if you start with an individual's lived experience and let them set the agenda? We find one who is still overwhelmed by hurt from a past abusive relationship, another whose thoughts day and night are consumed by worry for a wayward child, and another who is busy working out how they can afford that house they have their eye on.
It's not that the same people in church saying the creed are deceitful; nor that in their daily lives they are heedless of God. But if there is no space for the church members to set the agenda and air their real and uppermost concerns, there is a disconnect between church and the rest of life! This isn't the fault of the ordinary church members; it's the responsibility of a church leadership who never dare let go of the agenda.
When and how in church do the church members have the opportunity to set the agenda, to talk about what is actually uppermost in their mind?
Of course, a church service isn't a therapy group where each person may talk about what is troubling them. And I trust that they do find in their meeting with God that their personal needs are heard, understood and met.
But the more strongly a church sets an agenda, a 'party line', the less people will feel free to be themselves, to bring their real needs, and the more people will present a false and acceptable front. In practice this means:
- the more structured the church is, the less the chaotic experience of people's everyday lives can be shared
- the more church is based on 'experience', the less people's honest questions can be spoken
- the more intellectually rigorous the church is, the less people's up and down experience will be voiced
- the more that questions have a clear and definite answer, the less room there is for our real doubts to surface
and the more people will present a false and 'acceptable' front at church.
Ultimately, keeping tight control of the agenda leads to boredom and falsity; but it also leads to an even more serious problem - it excludes people who are seeking:
- If your church appears to be full of 'respectable' people, how can those who know they are not respectable come in?
- If your church appears to be full of 'successful' people, how can those who feel a failure gain access?
- If your church appears to be full of people of strong faith, how can those with a faltering faith gain entrance?
How tragic if church is somewhere one cannot be honest (as if God is fooled!), and how tragic if those with messy lives, doubts and questions are kept out!
The more you want your church to be open to 'real' needy people, the more your church needs to reflect their experience - which probably means allowing for and accepting messy people with doubts, questions and plenty of real-life problems. Pretending these don't exist doesn't get rid of them; it merely shows that your God isn't as loving as you say.
Accepting each other's reality could sometimes lead to difficulty, disagreements and even the potential of conflict. But in the context of loving Christian relationships, it also leads to life!
Our natural inclination is to drawn distinctions - in what ways are you and I different? what is it that marks this group out from that group? etc. We do this all the time quite naturally. For example, when buying a mobile phone we want to know the difference in features and costs between this model or price plan, and that one.
Our western society holds choice as a mark of freedom, to the extent that (I hear today) there are over 300 price plans for gas or electricity currently available in the UK. (I suppose this must prove that we are a very 'free' society!). So we have become totally used to navigating choices when it comes to buying gizmos, utilities or even frozen peas.
But as the choices become wider and wider, we often need to look for help in understanding the finer and finer distinctions between this and that, and turn to a whole industry to help us choose - expert reviews, consumer reviews, comparison websites, etc.
And, when it comes to churches, this materialistic attitude (for that is what it is) naturally comes along too. So I've just typed "which church" into Google, and now have over 300,000,000 results to help me!
Except that maybe it's not the differences between churches that matter.
The more we focus on differences, the more we splinter into fragments until, eventually, we come down to the individual level, for God made us each one of us different. But if we focus on the similarities, the common ground, we may find that we are all human, all made in God's image, all sinners, and all living on Earth together.
It's easy to be critical and find fault (except in ourselves!), but can we seek and find the good? Whatever you focus on will grow. Focus on the differences and faults and you'll find plenty. But Jesus looked at poor people, rich people, women, sick people and outcasts such as lepers, Samaritans (also outcasts), centurions, etc - all with an eye of love. I don't mean he turned a blind eye to their sins, but his attitude was always seeking their good, looking to draw them close to himself.
Can we earnestly seek his forgiveness for our critical spirit which sees only distinction and difference, and ask for his loving eyes, which see all Christians, in fact all humankind, as loved by him?
Then, perhaps, just perhaps, we will be less interested in the distinctions between churches and theological viewpoints, and more interested in getting on with doing his work of redemption - Christians united in one family. Now that would be force to be reckoned with! And the foundation for a fantastic witness (John 17v23).
When you're at the wrong end of a gun, things are simple.
There are many countries in which Christians are persecuted today. Imagine such a place, where a Christian is held at the point of a gun and an answer is demanded: "Are you a Christian? If you say you are, we'll kill you!". Now imagine that person responding with: "Well, it all depends on your stance concerning infant baptism - or the nature of the baptism of the Holy Spirit - or women in leadership"! Ridiculous! Yet these are issues that have divided churches...
Are you a Christian or aren't you?
So why does most of life seem more complicated? And why do so many such issues lead to division, shattering the unity among Christians that is commanded in the Bible?
Problem 1 - usurping God's role as Judge
The trouble is that we aren't content with having God answer the question of whether a person is a Christian, as that individual stands before Him. Instead, we are rather too determined to answer that question ourselves: if you don't meet my criteria for being a Christian, then I won't accept that you are!
We seem consumed by a need to be the judge, and so to usurp God's role.
What would happen if we left God to do his job? Maybe then we'd get on with our job, which is to love the Lord with all our heart and soul and mind, and to love our neighbours (whoever they are - Christian, Buddhist, Moslem, Pagan - it makes no difference) as ourselves (Matt 22 v36-39).
Problem 2 - confusing unity with uniformity
We too quickly turn to thinking: so which is the right group then? And having decided this - probably in our own favour - then the issue becomes: so how do we convince everyone else to agree with us and do the same as us? For then we'll have unity! And thence quickly to giving up, as these other annoying Christians don't seem to want to be 'converted' to our way of thinking!
No, the commanded unity is not about us all agreeing with one another.
Problem 3 - confusion over who we are fighting
Living in unity means understanding that we Christians face a common Enemy - and this is not another Christian denomination, not Islam, not a materialistic world - but the Devil.
Problem 4 - following Paul or Barnabas
We pride ourselves on following Wesley or Calvin or Luther or Wimber or ... or anyone really - rather than following Jesus. Paul dealt directly with this sin in 1 Cor 1 v 10-13.
Does this mean that we are to stop seeking the truth or stop being on our guard against heresy? By no means!
But we are very ready to take this to extremes. Either we fall into thinking that such differences are so minor as to be unimportant - 'we are all the same really' - and so end up with a wishy-washy, 'anything goes' Christianity and all are included. Or we may be drawn to the other extreme, where we are so clear and firm on the rightness of our understanding of Christian doctrine that all others have already been mentally assigned to hell. (So it seems that heaven is either going to contain everyone, or just you. But Jesus seemed to have own, different ideas!
Was Jesus wishy washy? Did he have an 'anything goes' attitude? Or was he so exclusive in his purity that he shunned all contact with regular sinful people? No, he held together absolute and unwavering truth with a loving embrace for all sinners who would accept him. We seem to find combining these two very difficult.
Practical unity
So how do we square this circle, hold this tension? Is it really possible for there to be Christian unity where people are so different, and have such different interests and emphases? It would have been so much easier if God had made all people the same!
Can such diversity really live in unity? Humanly speaking, no. But the church is not a human creation, and the qualities required - humility, forgiveness, love - are God-given, if we ask.
Maybe it starts with moving away from focusing on what's wrong with the other's position, to humbly seeking and learning from what God has revealed to them and which we haven't yet grasped? In what ways do they reflect God's grace better than ourselves?
For example, in my case, I may look to Protestants for a solid exposition of Biblical doctrine, but when it comes to being God's loving hands and feet in reaching out to ordinary people, to down and outs, or bringing God's love to slum-dwellers - then give me a Catholic any day.
So for me personally: I need to be living and working alongside Catholics in order to learn more about being God's loving hands in a hurting world, and alongside the Amish to learn more about God's simplicity in a materialistic and greedy world, and amongst Charismatics to listen more carefully to the Holy Spirit, and with Evangelicals in searching the scriptures, and with the Orthodox in better understanding sanctification, and with ... (Your list will be different.)
But now we're beginning to talk unity.
Jesus was uncompromising about unity; it was even a central point in his prayer for all Christians: "May they be brought to complete unity to let the world know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me", (John 17v23). So, what does Christian unity mean?
Does unity mean doing what Christians do today - getting together only with people of like mind? No, for this has resulted in literally thousands of Christian denominations, with more being formed all the time as groups fall out over some new distinction or issue so 'important' that a further split is necessary.
Nor does Christian unity mean remaining in our little silo, whilst attempting to have 'friendly discussions and occasional shared events' with the Christians in a neighbouring silo; talking with them on occasion but returning immediately to the security of our own ghetto.
Friends, this is not protecting the precious truth of the Gospel from the latest error or heresy - this is focusing on our differences when we should be focusing on our Lord. And the Devil laughs in delight! And everyone sees the hypocrisy.
It means remaining in fellowship and loving relationships with those with whom we don't necessarily agree. It means costly loving relationships that transcend differences in preferences, culture and theological understandings. It means demonstrating Christ's love through Christians loving other Christians! Now there's a radical idea.
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I am reminded of a poem I like:
Outwitted
He drew a circle that shut me out -
Heretic, rebel, a thing to flout.
But Love and I had the wit to win:
We drew a circle that took him in.
Edwin Markham (1913)
People flock to where the action is, not to where the talking is.
Considering Jesus' message was about forgiveness for sins and eternal salvation, have you ever wondered why he did so many miracles? What did healing people, stilling a storm, or even turning water into wine have to do with forgiveness or salvation?
Jesus was interested in and met the real needs of the ordinary people who surrounded him - for healing, for acceptance, for love. Sometimes a miracle, sometimes a loving look, sometimes taking a person by the hand.
People flocked to him because they knew that what he did worked! Not just fancy words, but actions that worked, that made a practical difference.
Nowadays still, people flock to where the action is - where their needs will be met. If the local pub offers friendship and belonging, is it any wonder that people go there? If the lottery offers hope, people who are short on hope will queue up there. If the local medium or spiritual healer offers answers or cures, people will go there.
If the local church is all talk and theological arguments, who needs that? Plenty of words but nothing that works - who wants to queue up for that? (And don't respond by saying that people's deepest need is for salvation. If that's not where people are currently at, that's not the place to begin. Jesus didn't make that mistake.)
I'm not preaching a social gospel or salvation by works, but Christianity isn't first about getting the theology right, it's about getting the loving right. Get the loving right - and then people will be interested in the message. It's not the other way around! Jesus knew this.
We may not be doing regular feeding-the-five-thousand and raising-the-dead miracles, but practical loving in the name of Jesus, meeting people's needs: those are conspicuous miracles in our greedy and selfish world.
